It's Raining!

Ok, not literally. Because it is, after all, July in Santa Maria and we just don't get rain in July in Santa Maria. That won't start until later in the fall.


"When it rains, it pours" is what I'm referring to. I'm not sure if we're in the raining phase or the pouring phase right now but it's at least raining kinda hard.

1. It started dripping last week in our garage from our upstairs master bath. This is the 2nd time it's done this so we called our insurance to get it figured out. I currently have (and have had) 2 men in my garage ripping out the ceiling. After not being able to do laundry all weekend (keep in mind there's 6 of us) because they'd covered right up to the washer/dryer with plastic, they called me this morning and said they were coming to rip out the ceiling above the washer/dryer, pulling them out and pulling out the cabinets above. yay. So I had 1 1/2 hrs to wedge myself between the plastic (which is heavy and taped down to the floor) and the washer to try to get some laundry done before they actually unhook the appliances, for who knows how long. I dried what I could but washing was most crucial so I have several wet loads of laundry laying around in my living room trying to dry.

They say they'll have to rip out our master bath and shower to get to the subfloor. Again, yay (with as little enthusiasm I can possibly muster). Did I mention this is what I woke up to on my birthday? Yes, Matt came in and said, "Happy Birthday, the garage is flooding".

They've hooked up these drying units in the garage and in our bathroom to dry out the wood and everything. So we've been sleeping to the constant hum and sometimes stir of the machines. I have to tell myself it's like a fan in a hotel and work myself into a sleep.

2. Yesterday I got in the car after church and got a text from Matt. It said he'd been in a wreck but he was ok. Suddenly I became a wreck, and so did the kids. He really was ok. He'd swerved to miss a deer on the road, spun the car several times then ran through a barbed wire fence and high centered the car on a hill. He was out for several hours waiting for the tow truck to come so he came home very sunburned and exhausted. It was scary for all of us and we're so thankful he's ok. His car... well it'll take some work. He joked that he was going to trade it in for a truck. If you don't know my husband, let me just say, he's a car guy. I've always wanted him to get a truck but he likes the fast sports cars...which is what got him in this predicament I suppose. So no, I don't see a truck in his future but hopefully just a more cautious driver and hopefully less of a need for speed.

Like I said, I don't know if it's raining or pouring right now but I'm hoping it stays steady for a while. Hopefully we can get a handle on all of this before moving on to life's next challenge. Keeping us on our toes! :)

A Stroll Ahead

You know when you have a baby and you have 9 months (or 8 or whatever) to prepare? People throw you a baby shower and you shop and shop and by the time baby gets there you are pretty well set?


Well it doesn't work that way for us. We get a call and get a baby a couple days later, or in this case 2 babies. And then when we get those babies, we understand very completely that we may or may not get to keep them. 


There's no baby shower. I did have a friend offer to throw a baby shower when we got these babies, because we really did need stuff for them (like another crib that a friend graciously gave us), clothes, etc. But here's the deal. Would I want a baby shower for these 2 babies, only to have them return to parents in 6-12 months? Then if we fostered again, another shower for another child? Different age/gender perhaps so we need more stuff? You can see why this can get a little sticky. Plus, having a shower feels very attaching. Like I "had" (or adopted) this baby and I'm keeping it.


So given that situation, how many of you would want to spend a lot of money on those babies? I mean, lets get real. Of course they need clothing and necessities, and you want them to look cute but if there was a chance you couldn't keep your kids (which aren't technically yours), how much money would you actually spend on them?


When we got the babies I really needed a double stroller. I wanted one I could attach the infant seat to since Avery was just 2 months. I really wanted a nice stroller but didn't want to spend the money because, once again, who knows? So I went to the local 2nd hand kids store and bought the only double stroller they had. I was very fortunate that it absolutely met my needs and has been great. However as the kids have grown a little this year, I continue walking them (and the dog) to the park often. I pull that stroller in and out of the car often, I crash into aisles, doorways and sometimes, unfortunately, people with my long stroller. Now, I also have an umbrella side by side stroller that a friend loaned me before I got the double long. That one is much easier to pull in and out of the car and set up. With the long one I have to remove both seats before I can fold it so it's just a couple extra steps. With the side by side I struggle even more to get through door ways and then the kids are spread across the aisle in the store so they can both reach out and grab things.


I've always been a stroller person, just ask Matt. We used to have at least 3 strollers for Aliyah because each stroller served a purpose. Big & comfy, smaller & more compact, and umbrella. I want a stroller to handle well, even with one hand if possible so I can walk the dog with the other, grab a running child, take a drink or whatever. I told Matt that in August if things go our way in court, I'd like to buy a nice stroller that fits all my needs {wants}.


Well towards the end of June we started to realize that things were looking really good for us with the babies...and I started to stroller shop. After all, we're taking some mini-trips this summer and a good stroller would be awfully nice.

Here's what I found:

This stroller has the "footprint" of a single, the 2nd seat can actually be removed to make it a single stroller AND I can leave the seats on when I fold it up. (I could go on and on about all the cool stuff this stroller does but I won't bore you with the details)

I have butterflies in my stomach even as I write this because I'm letting a part of me relax a little and look forward to the future with these babies. Certainly buying this stroller was a big step for me and it still makes me nervous to just let go and accept that we will most likely, hopefully, maybe be able to adopt these babies. I can't completely let that go and feel comfortable until August 29th. But in the mean time, we'll be strolling more comfortably.

Father's Day 2012 Video

This is the Fathers Day video I made for my dad this year.

Aliyah loses her first tooth!

July 2, 2012

Age 6

I don't know what it is about this little girl, maybe it's the missing tooth. But lately she seems so grown up to me! I'm sad to see the baby in her disappear but I'm loving the girl she's becoming. She's so fun and she cracks me up. Love you Aliyah Leilani!

Music to my ears

Yesterday I heard the words 

Permanency 

and

Fost-Adopt

come out of our social workers mouth.

We have a new social worker (thank goodness) and we met for the first time yesterday. I really like her, but probably because she said those words. She was brief, she's new to this position and feels like if she's not talking, she doesn't need to be here. The other workers hang out with the kids and play with them for an hour. Either way is fine.

She still doesn't know bdad's status...again that's fine. 5 weeks without visits and we don't know if they'll start up again or when. She asked if we're a fost-adopt home. I said yes. She said she's going to get us a permanency worker. She's not entirely transferring the case to permanency because it's too early for that but she's going to have a worker contact us and get started on the case "just in case it goes there". She also mentioned that the way things are looking right now, it's very likely that's where we're headed.

She explained that with court being Aug 29, she has to have her recommendation in by Aug 12th. That's only 6 weeks away. What she didn't say, but what I already know is: within 6 weeks, bdad would have to

• start showing up for visits
• get back on a regular weekly visit schedule
• start supervised home visits
• do unsupervised home visits
• do overnight visits at his home

I'm not comfortable with saying this is impossible or it can't happen in the allotted time frame. But I can say what I was told a couple months ago by the social worker I didn't like. She said that in order for things to progress towards reunification in Aug, bdad would have to start home visits in June.

Each week we wait, and by the end of the week the sigh of relief gets a little bigger. We are very hopeful. Our regular social worker (through Angels) told me yesterday, "whatever you guys have been praying, just keep praying it because it seems to be working". I just pray that things don't progress with visits.

And I 

Thank You

for your continued prayers.

August is right around the corner.

Still Rising...

Bdad has missed 4 visits in a row. The circumstances are out of his immediate control but do count against him. Tomorrow will be visit #5 and unless a miracle happens for him, he will not be visiting tomorrow either. After that we don't know. No one really knows and we're all just waiting to find out what happens next. Each day could bring new information and sometimes it does.


Waiting...


I'm not a patient person but this whole adoption process with each of our children has forced me to become more patient. I just want to know what's happening and what's going to happen. But I guess that's for Heavenly Father to know, and for us to patiently wait to find out.

Hope Rising...Cautiously

Due to circumstances with bdad, visits are not happening right now. We don't know how long this will last. They could pick up again next week or next month. We don't know. So far 2 visits have been missed/cancelled.

Every Wednesday that goes by without a visit is better for us. We're continuing to pray that visits do not progress. Even if they continue doing visits the way they were is fine with me. What I don't want is Home visits and/or unsupervised visits. 

For now, we're enjoying the fact that visits just aren't happening. We're getting closer to the end and that makes each week very crucial.

Love these babies!!